KGB Morning Pages 2.19

The following is a 750 word passage written as an exercise. The exercise is an early morning writing session where the pen doesn't stop until I reach 3 pages. 'Morning pages', as they are called, are a stream of immediate consciousness. I wrote these words at 6am and read them 14 hours later at literary institution and local watering hole KGB Bar in East Village. Manhattan, NYC:

Revolution is a concept that was once just floating. It was radical. It was a moment and then quiet and then came back into public consciousness. Those who were always aware were always on the the wave of revolution but those weren’t now seem to be ripples coming into the total collapse of the American empire we are now witnessing. i am writing these morning pages thinking about the fact that Elon Musk has some how become our president. That the richest person in the world can just buy a government. Buy a president. I guess its always sort of been like that but never so blatant and unapologetic. I mean seriously no social security? Access to the treasury? There have been so many plane crashes I mean a Blackhawk hit a commercial airliner like why has that just been swept under the tsunami of everything else in the first 30 days. Has it been even a full month and I'm not fear mongering when I say that we need to be ready. We live on a day to day basis. I am anchored down with the people I love and the practices that feel good light up my soul I am social I am loving I am in community but for real. I cannot stop thinking back to the summer when I was still friends with [redacted] maybe one of the last times we meaningfully spent time together. He didn't believe me when I told him the other shoe was going to drop and its dropping now that ominous cloud of something evil and wicked and spiritual hangs above us and now we are slowly feeling its descent onto the land I mean its happening right now and gradually and subtly in a way that feels like way too much but also not enough to just break free and go for it but opposition they are really going for it. I almost forgot it was Black History Month I could never forget but I almost forgot because the way we are moving the way I am moving through space requires an urgency I have yet to even comprehend when I'm in it I feel it when I'm not I remember who I am. We are we are. We are making these smaller conversations larger. I spoke to so many older women last weekend a divine weekend I partied and slept and drank and smoked and still did my laundry I did it all and the consensus was that we were not expecting to fight in this lifetime. We were not expecting to give up our comforts so soon at any age you are affected. I am affected and she is affected and the older men and younger boys and girls we are all affected something has been taken from us.

They will continue to take until when? is enough enough. I made a choice to detox from twitter I can't I have seen it change and the change is nasty but the witches online say that they have tried to hex Donald but he is malevolently protected. The dark forces are guarding him up and allowing him to reign and that one time Elon Musk asked how much it would be to end world hunger and then a world hunger organization began making a plan for him to end world hunger which would only cost 6 billion dollars and he completely walked back on his inquiry I mean you cannot make this stuff up. I remember smelling smoke all throughout the fall. Prospect Park was on fire, Jersey had fires, there was a fire Uptown and then California and then the planes and then I said wow I am blessed to be alive one time when I was riding the train with my dad I was 12 years old and he asked me what I wanted to be and I said a revolutionary. Why would I even say that why did I think that was something for me to be there was no revolution happening but now I think I had something in me that perhaps knew subconsciously deeper than the things I thought about at that time that if something were to ever pop off I would be there and I would make the choice to stand guard and fight back. We are making choices and everyday we live we fight back we live we fight back  we fight back by living. We are alive so we live.