Limon Theater Burlesque 12.7

I haven’t been to one wedding since I was a child.

The bride was my aunt’s stepmother, and the groom was her father. When I say aunt I don’t mean a literal blood relative, my Aunt Janine is my mother’s best friend and these were her parents. This is how Black families work. Sister and friend are pretty much the same thing. 

My first wedding was between two elders who found each other later in life. Mr Boynes, 51 and his soon to be fifth wife Debra was 40. They met at church, singing in the choir. I was one of three flower girls. 

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Marriage, 

as I learned in my Catholic school, 

was a financial agreement before it was ever a feeling. One family connects to another to combine their assets for one joint slay. In Leviticus chapter 18 Jacob worked for Laban for seven years only so he could marry his youngest daughter Rachel. At the wedding, Laban switched Rachel with his eldest daughter. For Jacob to marry the woman he actually loved, he had to work another 7 years. I heard this story and left with an impression—the pursuit of love is worth the effort. 

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Poem

 

We shift 

between who we are and what we want 

Oscillating between softness and self defense protects me from myself 

If I fall into you I am unable to run fast enough 

to set up the net and catch myself

*just in case*

Therein lies the vulnerability 

By opening my window

I accept the fact that when I’m real with you 

I form the weapon and place it in your hand. 

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The Look of Love is a song written in 1967 by Burt Bacharach and Hal David. Originally it was meant to be an instrumental, a melody inspired by the actress Ursula Andress in this movie Casino Royale. Since its creation it’s been covered by numerous artists including Dusty Springfield, Dionne Warwick and Nina Simone. My favorite version is by Shirely Bassey which I’m gonna dance to today. I love this version because it is not shy about its yearning. She’s loud, it’s dramatic and there’s sincerity in every inflection. As an unchill, proud yearner, an unabashed conviction to be seen and held is something I indulge in frequently.  

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When faster foods no longer satiate, develop an appetite for what’s nourishing. 

& wear white as an offering.